


Meme Sluts Chatroom (Officially Moved Here)

by Dirt_Dumpster_Dianna



Category: The Walking Dead (Telltale Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Anyway yeah I'm not funny I'll let Evelyn do what she needs to do now, Big Meme Energy, Honestly this was meant to be a shitpost, Implications of spoilers but nothing is directly said, Most of these characters are bisexual and they flirt with each other constantly, Multi, Must be really really mysterious, Rarepairs and shit, This Is STUPID, Violet did crossfit once in this entire fic and slept for like... 20 hours I think, Whatever you call it, Wow I wonder what happens in the first five chapters, but i like it, chat fic, yeah - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-25
Updated: 2019-04-11
Packaged: 2019-11-05 17:21:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 13,517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17923106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dirt_Dumpster_Dianna/pseuds/Dirt_Dumpster_Dianna
Summary: I teamed up with Evelyn to keep the controversy away. Here it is: the official moved fanfic, Meme Sluts ChatroomLouis- You know, I really do admire his enthusiasm to do the impossibleLouis- Really inspires me to also do stupid thingsSo, if you're against whatever's in the tags, simply keep off this fic. No harm is done





	1. First Of All, I Make Titles Unrelated To The Actual Chapter

**Author's Note:**

> Yup, it's here, it's queer, and OmenOfTheInnovative has deployed me (the best in the world) to post this here
> 
> Anyway, the first five chapters are still gonna be kept the same. BUT! There are also updates that I have to admit break the fourth wall a decent amount of times
> 
> Anyway, yeah, if you wanna reread this, here it is

_**Clementine Everett has created a group chat** _

_**Clementine Everett has added 7 other people to the group chat** _

_**Clementine Everett has changed the group chat’s name to Meme Sluts Chatroom** _

**Clementine Everett-**  Yo

 **Violet Knight-**  Yo

 **Louis Wright-**  Uhm

 **Mitch Johnson-**  That accusation was uncalled for. I’ll have you know that I am in fact not a meme slut and you know this, Clementine

 **Louis Wright-**  Double uhm

 **Clementine Everett-**  Yes you are you have memes on your phone

 **Clementine Everett-**  And that other thing that I know that you know that I know is on there

 **Mitch Johnson-**  You wouldn’t

 **Clementine Everett-**  ;)

 **Violet Knight-**  Can I just have one chill group chat? Ever?

 **Clementine Everett-**  No instead you get a chill group chat Everett

**Violet Knight-**

**Louis Wright-**  Triple uhm???

 **Clementine Everett-**  And suddenly, plot convenience!

_**Clementine Everett has changed their nickname to SpiidrWahmnn** _

**SpiidrWahmnn-**  Actually this is worse

 **Louis Wright-**  WHOA

 **Louis Wright-**  QUADRUPLE UHM?????

 **Violet Knight-**  Uh

 **Violet Knight-**  You just kinkshamed yourself Clem

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  Of course I did what did you expetc

 **Violet Knight-**  Expetc

 **Louis Wright-**  Expetc

 **Mitch Johnson-**  Expetc

 **Marlon King-**  Expetc

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  Oh hey Marlon you just ninja appeared from thin air

**_Marlon King has changed their nickname to Soul Brother_ **

**_Soul Brother has changed Violet Knight’s nickname to Soul Sister_ **

**_Soul Sister has changed Louis Wright’s name to The Train_ **

**The Train-**  Wtf

 **The Train-**  Was this planned

 **Soul Brother-**  Yes

 **Soul Sister-**  Yes

_**Mitch Johnson has changed their name to Boii** _

**Boii-**  Yes

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  Oof I just heard a knock on my floorboards?

 **Soul Sister-**  Are you walking around?

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  Shit

 **The Train-**  Spread the word

 **Soul Brother-**  Clem’s high

 **Aasim Jackson-**  Hey gang!

**Soul Sister-**

**Soul Sister-**  C I C L E TI NE

 **Aasim Jackson-**  Of course...

 **Soul Sister-**  So what’s the point of this group chat

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  Well. To put it simply.

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  What’s question 5?

 **Soul Brother-**  By god

 **Soul Sister-**  By god

 **The Train-**  We expected better from you, Star Student!

 **Aasim Jackson-**  Am I supposed to be concerned or surprised or what the shit is happening?

_**Soul Sister has changed Aasim Jackson’s nickname to Author Boi** _

**Soul Sister-**  I shall assume this is the meeting place for the individuals you call “Meme Sluts,” me included.

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  That would be correct, Violet.

 **The Train-**  They actually used periods after their sentences??? Like wtf???

_**The Train has changed their nickname to Music Boi** _

_**Music Boi has changed Soul Sister’s nickname to Smol Punk** _

**Smol Punk-**  Change it BACK

**_Soul Brother has changed their nickname to Tol Punk_ **

**Smol Punk-**  I SAID CHANGE IT BACK

 **Tol Punk-**  But I like it, Vi!

**Smol Punk-**

**Tol Punk-**

**Smol Punk-**  Fine

 **Tol Punk-**  Thanks to both of you <3

 **Music Boi-**  <3

 **Smol Punk-**  <4

 **Music Boi-**  Defeated

 **Boii-**  Defeated y’all gotta pay respects to our queen now

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  That would be me

**Boii-**

**Boii-**  No it wouldn’t???

 **Smol Punk-**  Well I’ll just go get some blankets while you argue

 **Boii-**  I got some for you. Want me to come over?

 **Smol Punk-**  Please. I’m cold

 **Boii-**  On my way

 **Tol Punk-**  Shower thoughts with Tol Punk-

 **Tol Punk-**  I am Tol

 **Tol Punk-**  But my sister is mini John Cena

 **Tol Punk-**  Perfect balance

 **Smol Punk-**  Shhh you’re amazing too

 **Tol Punk-**  Thank

 **Music Boi-**  I love this pair of blondies. They’re so adorable

 **Tol Punk-**  Excuse me, we are the amazing siblings. Don’t fuck with my Smol Punk sister or else we’ll both drop kick you into space

 **Smol Punk-**  But Uno reverse card??? I will kill to keep you safe???

 **Tol Punk-**  Imma go die of flattery now

 **Boii-**  HAVE THE BLANKETS

**Smol Punk-**

**Smol Punk-**  Can I have cuddles too?

 **Boii-**  Uh

 **Tol Punk-**  Sure. I’ll join so no monkey business goes on >.>

 **Smol Punk-**  Just join for the warmth and affection like a normal overprotective brother ffs

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  Yes I stan this

 **Music Boi-**  I stan it, but can I join too?

 **Smol Punk-**  Yes

 **Ruby Harris-**  What in tarnation? Louis, Marlon, and Mitch have migrated to Vi’s room for some reason?

 **Smol Punk-**  OOF

_**Ruby Harris has changed their nickname to Boots and Hats** _

**Boots and Hats-**  Just so y’all don’t change it to something stupid

 **Smol Punk-**  But I want to change it to something stupid???

 **Boots and Hats-**  Tough love, Vi. Tell me why half of the boys in our group are at your room

 **Smol Punk-**  You’re assuming, Ruby. We’re cuddling because I’m cold and they are really big warm and comfy teddy bears

**Boots and Hats-**

**Boots and Hats-**  Oddly cute???

 **Boots and Hats-**  I never expected this

 **Author Boi-**  I’ll stan because it’s actually kinda cute

 **James Anderson-**  Hi!

 **Smol Punk-**  Oh no

 **James Anderson-**  Hi Violet!

 **Smol Punk-**  OH NO

 **Boots and Hats-**  Why would-

_**SpiidrWahmnn has changed James Anderson’s name to Zombie Boi** _

**Zombie Boi-**  <3

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  <3

 **Tol Punk-**  Everybody’s flirting with each other

 **Smol Punk-**  Ew

 **Smol Punk-**  Flirting is for losers

 **Music Boi-**  Well there goes my plan to impress the mystical, BEAUTIFUL woman known as Violet ;0;

 **Smol Punk-**  Ur next

 **Tol Punk-**  That’s the first time you’ve ever used “ur”

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  Discourse in the Punk fandom

 **Smol Punk-**  You’re right

 **Smol Punk-**  Excuse my meme knowledge

 **Smol Punk-**  I've been defeated and now I'm gonna sign off for the hour

 **Smol Punk-**  So uh, bye. Be good people while I'm gone

_**Smol Punk is now offline** _

**Tol Punk-**  I'll go offline too, have Louis or Mitch wake me up if you need anything

 **Tol Punk-**  Like Vi said, be good people

_**Tol Punk is now offline** _

**SpiidrWahmnn-**

**SpiidrWahmnn-**  What are they doing, Lou?

 **Music Boi-**  OH MY GOD

 **Boii-**  Clementine this is fuckin' unbelievable

 **Music Boi-**  VIOLET JUST FUCKING DROPPED ONTO MARLON'S CHEST AND CLOSED HER EYES

 **Music Boi-**  SHES FUCKING SMILING I CAN SEE HER SMILE OH MY GOD

 **Boii-**  We're freaking out

 **Boii-**  Louis is crying I can see him crying

 **Music Boi-**  AND MARLON IS OKAY WITH IT

 **SpiidrWahmnn** \- Oh my god yES

 **Boots And Hats-**  Never before have I wished for two people to have a happy and healthy relationship as intensely as those two, whether it's platonic or not

 **Zombie Boi-**  It sounds nice :)

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  OTP OTP OTP OTP

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  I'M FREAKING OUT WITH YOU LOU

 **Music Boi-**  They're fucking cuddling I can't believe my eyes

 **Boii-**  It's like ten million fireflies-

 **Music Boi-** Had lit up the world as they fell asleep

 **Music Boi-**  MARLON WRAPPED HIS ARMS AROUND VI'S WAIST I'M GOING TO DIE

 **Music Boi-**  Violet opened one of her eyes to glare up at me am I making too much noise?

 **Boii-**  Kinda, yeah. You're acting like they're two cats that are cuddling together

 **Music Boi-**  Vi is literally a fucking cat what do you mean

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  Can confirm, she does cat things

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  Once we had a sleepover and I woke up to see her in the most uncomfortable position I could imagine on the couch

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  She's tried to use string before and ended up with it wrapped all around her body it took me like ten minutes to free her and keep the string still usable

 **Music Boi-**  What did I tell you guys

 **Boots And Hats-**  Once I saw her laying on the top of a wall and she reminded me strongly of a cat

 **Boii-**  So Vi's a cat confirmed

 **Zombie Boi-**  Yes, I saw her napping in the sun during the summer

 **Music Boi-**  Why didn't I see that? :0

 **Zombie Boi-**  Probably because she was in her backyard and she had invited me over to her house

 **Zombie Boi-**  We were getting a little sun because we'd been cooped up in her house for a while

 **Music Boi-**  I'm telling Marlon that he's cuddling with a literal cat

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  No don't wake him up

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  Let the punks sleep

 **Music Boi-**  Shit ur right

 **Zombie Boi-**  On that note, I'll be signing off. Thanks for coming to my TED Talk :)

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  :) Have a good day James

 **Music Boi-**  OH MY GOD HE USED A FUCKING MEME MY HEART IS GOING INTO CARDIAC ARREST BETWEEN HIM AND THE VIOLET-MARLON SITUATION

 **Boots And Hats-**  Have a good day, James!

 **Boii-**  Have a good day

 **Zombie Boi-**  Thank you! See you later!

_**Zombie Boi is now offline** _

**SpiidrWahmnn-**

**SpiidrWahmnn-**  So what's the answer to question 5?

 **Author Boi-**  S I G H

 **Author Boi-**  I suppose I can tell you

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  Well get on with it I need to go to baseball practice soon

 **Author Boi-**  42.15

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  Thankie!

_**SpiidrWahmnn is now offline** _

**Author Boi-**  I assume she doesn't need any more answers...

 **Music Boi-**  And I don't either! Thanks for helping me with my homework, Aasim!

 **Boii-**  And mine I was stuck on that shit for a while

 **Author Boi** \- You both are bad people

**Boots And Hats-**

**Boots And Hats-**  I swear it's for a good cause, Aasim

 **Author Boi-**  NOT YOU TOO RUBY

 **Boots And Hats** \- They were gonna make me raise all hell because I definitely got the question wrong!

 **Author Boi-**  WHY HAVE I BEEN BETRAYED AS SUCH

 **Music Boi-**  Because you're a nerd, Aasim

 **Boii-**  Preach it, brother

 **Music Boi-**  Well I think Clementine is pretty

 **Boii-**  Don't preach that you str8 fuck

 **Music Boi-**  NANI???

 **Music Boi-**  I'm Bi, thank you very much!

 **Boii-**  Whatever you're saying straight stuff and it's spilling my tea

 **Author Boi-**  I need a new friend group

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, the chat fic names right now are:
> 
> Clementine-SpiidrWahmnn  
> Louis-Music Boi  
> Violet-Smol Punk  
> Marlon-Tol Punk  
> Aasim-Author Boi  
> Mitch-Boii  
> James-Zombie Boi  
> Ruby-Boots And Hats
> 
> Uh yeah I think that's all


	2. Secondly, Who Ordered All These War Flash Backs?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the state of your friend's mental health is important

**Author Boi-**  V I O L E T

 **Smol Punk-**  WHAT DO YOU WANT

 **Author Boi-**  I SUMMON THEE

 **Smol Punk-**  WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU SUMMONING ME FOR AND WHY ARE WE YELLING ABOUT IT

 **Music Boi** \- "We want Louis to date Clementine!"

 **SpiidrWahmnn** \- Don't get too big for your britches, sweetheart

 **Smol Punk-**  Is this the problem

 **Author Boi-**  Now it's one of them

 **Smol Punk-**  Bring forth your offering in my DMs, k?

 **Tol Punk-**  How does hE SLIDE INTO YOUR DMS SO SMOOTHLY???

 **Smol Punk-**  Calm down, you disaster bisexual

 **SpiidrWahmnn** \- Which one?

 **Music Boi-**  Which One

 **Boii-**  Which one???

 **Tol Punk-**  Which one

**Smol Punk-**

**Smol Punk-**  Very good point

 **Author Boi-**  Whatever I'm gonna message you

 **Smol Punk-**  K you can slide into my DMs

 **Tol Punk-**  Still salty about this

 **Smol Punk-**  Shush you slide into my dorm every single day you can stand to let me have a private convo with somebody else for a while

 **Tol Punk-**  >:(

 **Tol Punk-**  Fine

 

_**A private conversation has been created between Violet Knight and Aasim Jackson** _

 

_**Aasim Jackson has changed their nickname to Writer's Block** _

_**Writer's Block has changed the chat room's name to Help Me** _

**Writer's Block-**  Unblock this mess

 **Violet Knight-**  What mess? I certainly didn't hear a please from you

 **Writer's Block-**  Please, give me inspiration

_**Violet Knight has changed their nickname to Idea Slut** _

**Idea Slut-**  A fictional character's friends have been turned into talking animals after they died. Describe the protagonist's experience with these intelligent pets

 **Writer's Block-**  Did you get that off Tumblr

 **Idea Slut-**  No but I plan on putting it up there

_**Writer's Block has changed their nickname to Inspired Bi** _

**Inspired Bi-**  Thanks

 **Idea Slut-**  No prob Bob

 **Inspired Bi-**  Never call me Bob again, please

 **Idea Slut-**  Fair enough

 

_**"Meme Sluts Chatroom"** _

 

 **Smol Punk-**  Back

 **Tol Punk-**  Did he say anything offensive???

 **Author Boi-**  You DO know I'm right here, correct?

 **Tol Punk-**  Shut up your mother buys you Mega Blocks instead of Legos

 **Author Boi-**  G A S P

 **Author Boi-**  You take that back mister

 **Music Boi-**  The sexual tension in this room

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  Hush Louis you're acting horny

 **Smol Punk-**  He's always horny

 **Music Boi-**  Am not!1!!1 >:/

 **Smol Punk-**  That only confirms my suspicions, Lou

 **Music Boi-**  Marlon tell Violet I'm not horny!

**Tol Punk-**

**Tol Punk-**

**Smol Punk-**  Well, Marlon?

**Tol Punk-**

_**Tol Punk is now offline** _

**SpiidrWahmnn-**  OH FUCK WE GOT A RUNNER

 **Music Boi-**  GET HIM BEFORE HE ESCAPES

 **Smol Punk-**  Wow, impressive

 **Smol Punk-**  I expected him to at least keysmash before he left

 **Author Boi-**  This is no longer my problem

 **Author Boi-**  I have a story to write

_**Author Boi is now offline** _

**Smol Punk-**  I feel betrayed

 **Smol Punk** \- War

 **Smol Punk-**  War never changes :'(

 **Music Boi-**  VI NOWS NOT THE TIME FOR 'NAM FLASHBACKS

 **Smol Punk-**  H E C C  O F F  L O U I S

 **Music Boi-**  W E  D O  N O T  U S E  T H A T  K I N D  O F  F U C K I N G  L A N G U A G E  I N  T H I S  G O D D A M N  H O U S E

 **Smol Punk-**  I'm dead now thanks for killing me

 **Music Boi-**  WHERE IS MARLON

 **Boii-**  Haven't seen him yet

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  I'll keep searching the library

**Music Boi-**

**Music Boi-**  I found him

**Smol Punk-**

**Smol Punk-**  Is he hiding in his closet again

 **Music Boi-**  Yes

 **Boii-**  All that stress for nothing?

 **Smol Punk-**  Oh well, I'll go drag him over to my room

 **Smol Punk-**  It'll help me clear my mind anyway, and I need the exercise

_**Smol Punk is now offline** _

**SpiidrWahmnn-**  I forgot to ask, but where's Ruby?

 **Boots And Hats-**  Watched the entire thing go down. That was Hell on Earth if I've ever seen it

 **Boii-**  Found the new pastor for my church of gays. Preach it, Ruby!

 **Boots And Hats-**  I think that Aasim is cute

 **Boii-**  GOD DAMMIT


	3. Third Of All, This Chapter Was Supposed To Be A Joke About A Vine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis has a bad time
> 
> There, said it

**Music Boi-**  Hey y'all

 **Music Boi-**  Guess what

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  Louis I stg if you do what I think you're gonna do

_**Tol Punk is now online** _

**Tol Punk-**  Hi yes why the FCUK DO I HEAR MEGALOVANIA

 **Smol Punk-**  More war flashbacks for me

 **Music Boi** \- Remember when you had a crush on Sans Vi

 **Smol Punk-**  Louis you do know that it was Aasim who had a crush on him right???

 **Music Boi-**  WHATEVER I CANT TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A NERD AND A GEEK ANYWAY

 **Smol Punk-**  Why the fuck are you yelling chill the fuck out god damn

 **SpiidrWahmnn-**  And welcome back to me screaming

 **Boii-**  Violet I need a pastor for my church o' gays you think you can take the role?

 **Smol Punk-**  Violet who??? I only know Biolet

 **Boii-**  Oh FUCK

 **Music Boi** \- Pleasant surprise. Violet made a pun

 **Music Boi-**  Now I can die happy

 **Smol Punk** \- Good. Meet me at high noon in front of the entire town. Imma shoot your ass boi

 **Music Boi-**  Oh, wow, I'm VERY intimidated

 **Smol Punk-**  Shush I'll drop kick you to space

 **Tol Punk-**  While I do understand that you're mini John Cena I just wanna point out

 **Tol Punk-**  You have chicken legs, Violet

**Smol Punk-**

**Smol Punk-**  What even iS THIS SLANDER

_**SpiidrWahmnn has changed Smol Punk's nickname to Chicken Legs** _

**Chicken Legs-**  CHANGE THAT SHIT BACK OR TASTE THE BLADE OF MY BOX CUTTER

_**SpiidrWahmnn has changed Chicken Legs's name to Smol Punk** _

**SpiidrWahmnn-**  There's no way in hell I'm gonna get stabbed today

 **Music Boi-**  Ur too pretty to be stabbed :D

 **Music Boi-**  (Bad time to bring this up, but... pretzel date???)

**SpiidrWahmnn-**

_**SpiidrWahmnn has changed their nickname to Music Gorl** _

**Music Gorl-**  Ur too handsome to be rejected

 **Music Gorl-**  I'll go on your date

 **Music Boi-**  Y O

 **Music Boi-**  MARLON IM BOUTA KISS MY GIRL FASTER THAN YOU ARE HOWS THAT FEELING GOING FOR YOU

 **Tol Punk-**  Oh my god

 **Tol Punk-**  You're really happy that I set up a date between you two, aren't you?

 **Smol Punk-**  With my assistance?

 **Music Boi-**  No I did this myself

 **Smol Punk** \- No you didn't but not I'm about to tell you how you needed help for it

 **Music Boi-**  I DID IT MYSELF VIOLET WHAT DO YOU M E A N

**Music Gorl-**

**Music Gorl-**  Now I understand why everybody said Louis had Big Dick Energy

 **Music Gorl-**  Cause dear god this mans got some

 **Smol Punk** \- Whose mans even is this

 **Boii-**  It's Clem's mans now

 **Smol Punk** \- Oh rip

 **Boii-**  We need an F in chat

 **Tol Punk-**  F

 **Music Gorl-**  F for myself

 **Smol Punk** \- Giant F I mourn your loss

 **Music Boi-**  >:/

 **Smol Punk-**  ;~;

 **Music Boi-**  ;D

 **Smol Punk** \- *Cocks box cutter aggressively*

 **Music Boi-**  Oh fuck I'm sorry ;0;

 **Smol Punk** \- :>

 **Boii-**  Did I just have a stroke or did I just see Violet use both emoticons- or whatever the fuck those were- and asterisks

 **Tol Punk-**  I don't think you're trippin' balls dude

 **Boii-**  What the F U CK

 **Smol Punk-**  :')

 **Boii-**  Let me commit Deathpacito now, please

 **Smol Punk-**  D:

 **Boii-**  Wait nevermind I can't find the strength to do it

 **Tol Punk-**  What kind of brownies did she eat today

 **Smol Punk-**  I've always checked to see if my food is drugged and always find nothing harmful in it

 **Tol Punk-**  Oh well e x c u s e me for expressing concern over you, Boo

 **Smol Punk-**  ???

 **Smol Punk-**  What the fuck was that???

**Tol Punk-**

**Tol Punk-**  IGNORE THAT

 **Boii-**  Entertainment = 1,000

 **Music Boi-**  Niceeeeeeee you're thirsting over Vi like a mofo Marlon

 **Tol Punk-**  IGNORE THAT SHIT VI

 **Smol Punk-**  >:P

 **Music Gorl-**  Today we play Battle Of A True Hero to mourn Marlon's death

 **Smol Punk-**  I WILL COMMIT CHOP OFF YOUR HAND IF YOU PLAY ONE OF THOSE CURSED SONGS

 **Music Gorl** \- BUT VIOLET ITS UNDERTALE

 **Smol Punk-**  FUCK YOUR UNDERTALE

_**Tol Punk is now offline** _

**Smol Punk-**  I AM NOT AFRAID TO- wait he's gone

**Music Gorl-**

**Music Boi-**

**Boii-**

**Music Gorl-**  Yeah he is

 **Smol Punk-**  Hmm, k. Gonna go fuck shit up for him, probably in the form of flipping a table

 **Music Gorl-**  Fair enough

_**Smol Punk is now offline** _

_**Boots And Hats is now online** _

**Boots And Hats** \- Y'all, I usually don't like saying this kind of stuff,

 **Boots And Hats-**  But what the f u c k is going on? Now Marlon's acting completely strange and out of it. He's huddled up drinking chocolate milk and reading a book, and I've never seen him like this

 **Music Gorl-**  He's just going through some embarrassment, don't worry. And you literally just missed it.

 **Boots And Hats-**  Is "Music Gorl" Clementine?

 **Music Boi-**  Officially my gf, too!

 **Boots And Hats-**  I'll take that as a yes

 **Boii** \- A total yes

 **Boii** \- I NEED A PASTOR FOR MY GAY CHURCH THO SO WHO DO I CHOOSE

 **Music Boi** \- Ever tried James? I heard he's pretty gay

 **Boii-**  Oh, that'll work. He'll be my backup if Vi doesn't work

 

_(Probably sometime after Marlon apologizes profusely to Violet)_

 

_**A private conversation has been created between Mitch Johnson and Violet Knight** _

_**Mitch Johnson has changed the chat room's name to Help Me Make A Gay Church** _

_**Mitch Johnson has changed two nicknames** _

**Plz-**  Quick say something gay

 **Potentially A Pastor???-**  I think that Marlon is attractive

 **Plz-**  That's not gay but I could use that as blackmail

 **Potentially A Pastor???-**  Or you could shove it up your gay ass

 **Plz-**  Ow now I'm gonna blackmail you

 **Plz** \- Imma tell Marlon!

 **Potentially A Pastor???** \- NOT IF I TELL MARLON FIRST

 **Plz-**  Oh fuck I can hear you typing your essay from the other room

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh right. I'm supposed to put the names that were changed
> 
> Clementine- Music Gorl
> 
> There we go now the world can rest


	4. And Fourth Reason!!! ...What Were We Talking About Again?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which shit is vague and people are screeching again

**Tol Punk-**  Guys, I'm so scared

 **Boii-**  ???

 **Boii-**  Did she say it?

 **Tol Punk-**  Who said what?

 **Boii-**  Did Violet tell you

 **Tol Punk-**  I don't recall what "it" is

_**Smol Punk is now online** _

**Smol Punk-**   _It_  is a movie about a killer clown that everybody's thirsting over. One of the characters in the movie has your dead cat hair, though, so I guess it wouldn't be too bad if you watched it

 **Smol Punk-**  Said it. How's that tea for you, Mitch?

 **Boii-**  Fucking S C A L D I N G

 **Smol Punk-**  Good

 **Smol Punk-**  I'll be your gay pastor btw, even if we're all bisexuals

 **Boii-**  T h a n k

 **Smol Punk-**  W e l c

_**Music Boi and Music Gorl are now online** _

**Music Gorl-**  Thanks for the pretzel date, it was fucking superb you funky little music man

 **Music Boi-**  Who are you calling little, Tinker Bell?

 **Smol Punk-**  Oh my god

 **Smol Punk-**  Please get a room already

 **Tol Punk-**  Please

 **Music Boi-**  N E V E R

 **Music Gorl-**  If you protest I'll make you watch us kiss, Violet

 **Smol Punk** \- Nani?

 **Tol Punk-**  She just singled you out, Vi. You bouta throw hands?

 **Smol Punk-**  C a t ch these hands in front of the school, Clem, and see how much you can actually force me to do stuff

_**Music Gorl is now offline** _

**Smol Punk-**  If she wasn't taller than me I would've went over to her room and set her on top of her closet already

_**Smol Punk is now offline** _

**Tol Punk-**  I'm actually gonna watch this

 **Boii-**  Wait, what were you even scared about in the first place?

 **Tol Punk-**  Oh, Vi sent me a picture of a giraffe in a tophat

 **Tol Punk-**  I know what it means and I'm so scared of what she might do to Clem now

 **Boii-**  What might she do???

_**Tol Punk is now offline** _

**Boii-**  MARLON TELL ME WHAT SHE MIGHT DO???

 **Music Boi-**  He's g o n e, Mitch

 **Boii-**  What in the f u c k

_**Music Boi is now offline** _

**Boii-**  UGH I'M GONNA HAVE TO WATCH VIOLET GET HER ASS KICKED

 **Boii-**  That's gonna be painful because I know how strong Clem is

_**Boots And Hats is now online** _

**Boots And Hats-**  I missed drama again?

 **Boii-**  Yeah, Violet and Clem are about to fight

 **Boots And Hats-**  Dammit, Vi's being aggressive and she hasn't even been a day into it

 **Boii-**  ???

 **Boii-**  Elaborate?

 **Boots And Hats** \- I shouldn't, she might yell at me

 **Boii** \- I'm a slut for details and you know this, Ruby. Tell meeeeeeeeeeeeee-

 **Boots And Hats-**  Oh my lord, please stop whining

 **Boots And Hats-**  She sent me a picture of a giraffe in a tophat

 **Boii-**  Marlon mentioned that too... T E L L  M E  W H A T  I T  M E A N S

 **Boots And Hats** \- Can't do that. Sorry

_**Boots And Hats is now offline** _

**Boii-**  Why have I been excluded from knowing this seemingly frightening omen's meaning???

 **Author Boi-**  I just got done writing my story

 **Author Boi-**  Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

 **Boii-**  Why haven't you spoken up until now

 **Author Boi-**  They might bother me a bunch if I come out of hiding

 **Boii-**  I can bother you too you know

**Author Boi-**

**Author Boi-**  F u ck

 **Author Boi-**  I must get a distraction

_**Author Boi has added Brody Fischer to Meme Sluts Chatroom** _

_**Author Boi has changed Brody Fischer's nickname to Nervous Wrecc** _

**Nervous Wrecc-**  Wwwhat thee fuck??

 **Author Boi** \- Distract Mitch while I make my daring escape

 **Nervous Wrecc-**  Whhy am I supposedd to do that?

 **Author Boi-**  I don't know, because you type weird? Why do you stutter in texts btw?

 **Nervous Wrecc** \- Ohh! I''m sorry! My ha ndss are just so shaaky

 **Author Boi-**  Guess what I kinda don't care

_**Author Boi is now offline** _

**Boii-**  Do you ever just wake up and it's like

 **Boii-**  What the fuck is going on?

 **Nervous Wrecc-**  Pleease don' say mean wordss

 **Boii-**  You need to take your prescriptions, Brody

 **Boii-**  So be responsible and do that, k?

 **Nervous Wrecc-**  Ookay

_**Nervous Wrecc is now offline** _

**Boii-**  I just remembered that Omar isn't here...

 **Boii-**  Nobody's listening

**Boii-**

**Boii-**  Country roads...

 **Boii-**  Take me home...

 **Boii-**  To the place...

 **Boii-**  That I know...

_**Nervous Wrecc is now online** _

**Nervous Wrecc-**  W E S T  V I R G I N I A

 **Nervous Wrecc-**  Hey, I'm not shaking anymore!

 **Boii-**  Nice, Bro-town

 **Nervous Wrecc-**  Please don't call me that

 **Boii-**  Could you add our god Omar to the chat? I don't have his contact and neither does anyone else but you, Vi, and Lou

 **Nervous Wrecc-**  Will do! He might be busy cooking, though

_**Nervous Wrecc has added Omar Carlton to Meme Sluts Chatroom** _

_**Boii has changed Omar Carlton's nickname to God** _

_**God has removed themselves from the chat** _

_**Nervous Wrecc has added Omar Carlton to Meme Sluts Chatroom** _

_**Omar Carlton has removed themselves from the chat** _

_**Nervous Wrecc has added Omar Carlton to Meme Sluts Chatroom** _

**Omar Carlton-**  Please stop

 **Nervous Wrecc-**  Please stay

 **Boii-**  Please stay, o' mighty one

**Omar Carlton-**

**Omar Carlton-**  Finneeeeeee

_**Boii has changed Omar Carlton's nickname to God** _

**Boii-**  Thank you!

 **God-**  I heard that Clem and Vi are about to fight

 **God-**  And earlier Vi sent me a picture of a giraffe in a tophat

 **God-**  I have to say that I'm not too afraid of what's gonna happen

 **Boii-**  What's gonna happen?

 **God-**  You'll see

_**Author Boi is now online** _

**Author Boi-**  Oh! New person! I'm guessing Omar?

 **God-**  Yo, I was telling Mitch about The Omen

 **Author Boi-**  No way. THE Omen?

 **God-**  THE Omen

 **Boii-**  What's that

 **Author Boi-**  Mitch you clueless bisexual

 **Author Boi-**  The Omen is not explained

 **Author Boi-**  It just HAPPENS

 **Boii-**  I'm so scared wtf is the omen

 **God-**  It's CAPITALIZED, Mitch. Give it some respect

 **Boii-**  Fine, what in the everliving FUCK is The Omen?

 **Nervous Wrecc-**  I can't believe he doesn't know what The Omen is

 **Boii-**  What is this cult shit

 **God-**  The Omen is a message that something powerful has risen from a gentle soul

 **Author Boi** \- Something even more powerful than Omar

 **God** \- It has the potential to be either REALLY GOOD, or REALLY BAD

 **Nervous Wrecc** \- It happens in almost a timely fashion, and lasts for a loosely set amount of time

 **God-**  Only select people understand what The Omen is about

 **Boii-**  How is a giraffe in a tophat supposed to be powerful

 **Author Boi-**  You wouldn't know what The Omen is about

 **Author Boi-**  Pathetic mortal mind

 **Boii-**  Why is The Omen scary to you?

 **God-**  Not scary, but unpredictable

 **Boii-**  So, from what I gather, this is something about Violet? Because she sent The Omen?

 **God** \- Yes

 **Boii-**  Why is she unpredictable when she sends The Omen

 **Nervous Wrecc-**  Foolish mortal! You don't know what kind of threat and promise The Omen holds just by existing!

 **Boii-**  What is this religion shit

 **God-**  Btw Clem and Vi are in front of the school. They look like they're about to have a shootout

 **Boii-**  Oh FUCK I didn't realize they were starting already

 **God-**  Clementine has stepped up to the ring

 **God** \- Violet is also stepping up, looking awfully anxious about something

 **Nervous Wrecc** \- I'm watching from my porch at the dorms! I can see that Violet does indeed look nervous

 **God** \- They're standing almost nose to nose, and...

 **Boii** \- Yeah? They started throwing hands?

 **God** \- Yes, Violet has started throwing hands...and arms, around Clem's shoulders

 **God-**  She's now hugging Clementine

 **Boii-**  I can see it now

 **Boii** \- Wtf I thought they were about to duke it out

 **God-**  And this is the nature of The Omen

 **Boii-**  Could you just tell me what The Omen is I'm so confused

 **Author Boi-**  Bruh

 **God-**  Sorry, not within my immense power

 **Boii-**  How is that possible

 **God-**  I'd get killed by Violet and everybody knows she possesses greater power than I

 **Boii-**  How does she have greater power?

 **God** \- Don't ask me that. It's the only question I can't answer

 **Boii** \- Y'all are w a c k

_**Smol Punk is now online** _

_**Smol Punk has changed their nickname to W a c k** _

**W a c k-**  Good news

 **W a c k-**  I remembered to take my Xanax today

 **God-**  Good job, Vi

 **W a c k-**  Thanks Omar

 **God** \- She knows who I am uh oh

 **Nervous Wrecc** \- Glad to see that you're taking care of yourself, Vi!

 **W a c k-**  Eh I think it's stupid I have to swallow these little shits on a somewhat regular basis

 **Nervous Wrecc-**  But it's good for you!

 **W a c k-**  No it isn't???

_**Author Boi has changed W a c k's nickname to Anxiety** _

**Anxiety** \- Why must we have plot convenience in this chat

 **Anxiety-**  Plot convenience is for the weak

 **Author Boi-**  The meme's already stale

 **Anxiety-**  Fuck you memes are never stale

_**Music Gorl is now online** _

**Music Gorl** \- And this is why Violet was added to a group called Meme Sluts Chatroom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chat name updates
> 
> Omar- God  
> Brody- Nervous Wrecc  
> Violet- W a c k/ Anxiety


	5. You Like Bad Girls? Great, I'm Bad At Everything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Marlon gets backstory, Violet gets drunk, and Sophie gets high
> 
> Yeah, in that order  
> Not really in that order

**Zombie Boi-**  DrunkChild.JPG

 **Zombie Boi-**  Uh, is she okay?

 **Tol Punk** \- Yo wtf why is Violet playing the tuba upside down on the couch

 **Boii-**  Why does Sophie look high sitting beside her

 **Music Gorl-**  Are either of them okay

 **Music Gorl-**  Vi has a fucking Pizza Hut shirt on her when did she get a job

 **Tol Punk-**  She stole it from me. I used to work at Pizza Hut for a while

 **Music Gorl-**  Okay so it's now valid for her to have that shirt on

 **Zombie Boi-**  I smell weed

 **Zombie Boi-**  Oh no

 **Tol Punk-**  Sophie smokes weed what do you mean oh no

 **Zombie Boi-**  Weed isn't good for my cat I need to find him

 **Boii-**  I VOLUNTEER

 **Boii-**  WHAT DOES HE LOOK LIKE

 **Zombie Boi-**  Buddy is a chartreux kitty, so he's gray and has yellow eyes

 **Boii-**  Oh you mean Gunther? No worries he was chilling with me this whole time

**Zombie Boi-**

**Zombie Boi-**  So you're saying that my cat has snuck off to your dorm the entire time I thought he was outside

 **Zombie Boi-**  And you named him Gunther

 **Boii-**  Yeah??? I'll return him if you want???

 **Zombie Boi-**  No, I just wanted to confirm it

 **Zombie Boi-**  Because it's really cute that you renamed him and everything

 **Boii-**  SHUSH I LIKE HIM

 **Zombie Boi** \- Thanks for keeping him safe, I just don't want Sophie to accidentally squish him or something while she's higher than a kite

 **Zombie Boi** \- <3

**Boii-**

**Tol Punk-**  Oh my GOD

 **Music Gorl-**  Y E S

 **Music Gorl-**  IMPRESS THAT MANS JAMES

 **Zombie Boi-**  I was just showing my appreciation...?

 **Music Gorl-**  Go and hug him if you really wanna show him how thankful you are

 **Zombie Boi-**  Okay!

_**Zombie Boi is now offline** _

**Boii-**

**Boii-**  Oof

 **Music Gorl-**  And thus, the adventure begins

 **Tol Punk-**  A better romance than Twilight

 **Boii-**  Shut up, you mean people >:P

 **Music Gorl-**  Denial means that you're gya for him so HA

 **Tol Punk** \- Gya

 **Boii-**  Gya

 **Music Gorl-**  Now it's my turn to be shamed

 **Music Gorl-**  This is the second time y'all have called me out for this

 **Music Gorl** \- How could you guys have betrayed me so?

**Anxiety is now online**

**Anxiety** \- becuse thEyre t h ots

 **Anxiety** \- im white girl wastd and i dunno why

 **Music Gorl-**  We saw that you were drunk

 **Tol Punk-**  Are you okay? Do you need me to take you back to your room?

 **Anxiety-**  whoa no need FOr the romantic gesturre marvin

**Tol Punk-**

**Tol Punk-**  My name is Marlon

_**Boii is now offline** _

**Music Gorl-**  And this is the time when I debate whether Violet is drunk or sleepy

 **Anxiety** \- both

 **Anxiety-**  and lonelyyYYYyyyy

 **Tol Punk-**  Fuck it, I'll carry you back to your dorm

 **Anxiety-**  i just need A Blankie

 **Music Gorl-**  I stan Violet saying blankie now

 **Tol Punk-**  I'll be there in no time

_**Tol Punk is now offline** _

**Music Gorl-**

**Music Gorl** \- I hate to be nosy, but...

 **Anxiety-**  marlon is prolly the only guy i feel attracted to if thats your question

 **Music Gorl-**  Oh

 **Music Gorl-**  That was my question

 **Anxiety-**  called It !

 **Music Gorl-**  You really are drunk. Capitalization is wrong, punctuation is completely fucked, and you're misspelling a few of your words

 **Anxiety-**  yeah i got it hotshot

 **Anxiety** \- no need to point it out for tHe worl

 **Anxiety-**  i just feel so fuckin lonely rn

 **Music Gorl-**  Do you wanna talk about it?

 **Anxiety** \- na h ill just wait for maryland to gt here

 **Music Gorl-**  Hm, okay

_**Anxiety is now offline** _

**Music Gorl-**

**Music Gorl-**  Now I understand how she feels this really is lonely

 

~~**(Time skip that probably won't ever appear again in this fic. Violet's now sober and Louis is bored)** ~~

 

_**Music Boi is now online** _

_**Music Boi has added Minerva Rockingham and Sophie Rockingham to Meme Sluts Chatroom** _

**Music Boi-**  Welcome to the game, Detective Tapp >:)

_**Music Boi has changed 12 nicknames** _

**Once drew hentai for a friend-**  Waddup Lou

 **Once drew hentai for a friend-**  Oh shit oh shit u right my dog

 **Fabulous-**  Thank you, my homie

 **Still continues to write bad Twilight fanfiction-**  Wtf I just woke up

 **Grew up on Slasher films-**  Not even gonna lie this isn't the worst you can do to me Louis

 **Fabulous** \- You want me to do something worse? ;)

 **Grew up on Slasher films** \- Yeah go for it you arrogant cactus

_**Fabulous has changed Grew up on Slasher films's nickname to Used to be a ballerina** _

**Used to be a ballerina-**  I told you to do something worse wtf is this softcore exposure

 **Fabulous-**  I thought you'd be embarrassed by now

 **Used to be a ballerina** \- Nah, this is too easy to admit to

 **Once drew hentai for a friend-**  Ey that's my home slice Vi right there

 **Used to be a ballerina-**  Yeah

 **Used to be a ballerina-**  And you're Sophie, you smut dumpster

 **Once drew hentai for a friend-**  You got it boo

**Kissed a mouse-**

**Kissed a mouse-**  What is this s l a n d e r

 **Once drew hentai for a friend-**  Yup that's my sis, always out there looking for love

 **Once drew hentai for a friend-**  Even if it's a really fuckin weird love interest

 **Kissed a mouse-**  SHUSH I WAS 6 I DIDN'T KNOW BETTER

 **Used to be a ballerina** \- At least you got something that nobody knew

 **Has a Spider-Man body pillow-**  What's up I'm just gonna come out right here and now. It's Clementine, A.K.A. I want to die-Chan

 **Fabulous-**  Can confirm that she has one!

 **Has a Spider-Man body pillow-**  Oof I wanna die now

 **Monster Fucker-**  What does my nickname mean?

 **Has a Spider-Man body pillow-**  NO DON'T YOU DARE

 **(Blushing Emoji)-**  It means you love mythical creatures, James

**(Blushing Emoji)-**

**Monster Fucker-**  But why the f word? Also, I love your nickname, Mitch

 **(Blushing Emoji)** \- Uh

 **(Blushing Emoji)-**  QUICK AASIM SAY SOMETHING STUPID

 **Still continues to write bad Twilight fanfiction-**  Love is stored in the rat

 **Monster Fucker-**  Aw, couldn't be truer!

 **(Blushing Emoji)** \- It worked

 **Monster Fucker-**  You're still really cute though!

 **(Blushing Emoji)-**  F U CK

 **Yeehaw'd their way to the moon-**  Healthy relationships are all around me, and I love it

 **Yeehaw'd their way to the moon-**  One question, though. When do I get one?

 **Monster Fucker-**  I'm sure it'll be sometime soon, Ruby. Good things come to those who wait

 **Yeehaw'd their way to the moon-**  Thank you, James

 **Monster Fucker-**  :)

 **Used to be a ballerina** \- Okay give me something good Lou I'm tired of this boring name you gave me

 **Fabulous-**  Will do, princess!

 **Used to be a ballerina** \- Never call me that. Ever

 

_**A private conversation has been created between Louis Wright and Violet Knight** _

**Louis Wright-**  Ready, Harvey?

 **Violet Knight-**  As ready as I'll ever be

 **Louis Wright** \- Ok, let's do this

 

_**"Meme Sluts Chatroom"** _

 

_**Fabulous has changed Used to be a ballerina's name to Has a crush on Marlon** _

**Has a crush on Marlon-**

**Almost burned down the house trying to make toast-**

**Has a crush on Marlon-**  It could be explained?

_**Almost burned the house down trying to make toast has changed their nickname to Wants to go on a date with Violet** _

**Has a crush on Marlon-**

**Wants to go on a date with Violet-**

**Has a crush on Marlon-**  Chick-Fil-A? I can pay

 **Wants to go on a date with Violet-**  Sure, but we can split the cost

_**Has a crush on Marlon is now offline** _

_**Wants to go on a date with Violet is now offline** _

**Has a Spider-Man body pillow-**  Yay when's the wedding for those two

 **Fabulous-**  Knowing them it'd be something really punk and still super adorable

_**Has a Spider-Man body pillow has changed 12 nicknames** _

**Music Gorl-**  I enjoy plot convenience

 **Minerva-**  What's my nickname

 **Minerva-**  Oh I don't have one

 **Minerva-**  I'm sad now :'(

 **Sophie-**  Hook me up with that sweet nickname brother

_**Music Boi has changed Sophie's nickname to DWH** _

**DWH-**  What does my nickname mean

 **Music Boi** \- Drawing while high

 **Music Gorl-**  Drunk white hippy

 **DWH** \- Clem I was smoking not drinking

**Music Gorl-**

**Minerva-**

_**Music Gorl has changed Minerva's nickname to RBH** _

**RBH-**  Elaborate?

 **Music Gorl** \- Red-Bedhead

 **RBH-**  Fair enough

 **Zombie Boi-**  How lovely that you two joined! Hope you enjoy your stay here!

 **Boii-**  I honestly want your energy and enthusiasm, James

 **Author Boi-**  The hero we need but don't deserve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah I may or may not have accidentally deleted what Louis changed the names to but I somehow remembered it???
> 
> Has a Spider-Man body pillow- Clementine  
> Fabulous- Louis  
> Almost burned the house down trying to make toast/Wants to go on a date with Violet- Marlon  
> Grew up on Slasher films/Used to be a ballerina/Has a crush on Marlon- Violet  
> (Blushing Emoji)- Mitch  
> Monster Fucker- James  
> Once drew hentai for a friend- Sophie  
> Kissed a mouse- Minerva  
> Still continues to write bad Twilight fanfiction- Aasim  
> Yeehaw'd their way to the moon- Ruby  
> Diagnosed with nervous bitch disease- Brody  
> Shaggy's reincarnation- Omar
> 
> Let's hope I remembered them all I have a killer headache
> 
> DWH- Sophie  
> RBH- Minerva


	6. The First Chapter That Isn't A Repost! ...Oh Boy, This One Is Not What Y'all Would Expect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Evelyn actually wanted to give a funny description to, Violet gets a major surprise, and Louis is trying so hard not to burst out in laughter

_**Anxiety is now online** _

**Anxiety-** And then I slit her throat!

 **DWH-** Haha yeah that was the shit Vi

 **DWH-** Wait

 **DWH-** Why am I not high

 **Music Gorl-** You just so happen to not be high at the very moment don't worry it happens to everybody

 **DWH-** O that makes sense

 **Tol Punk-** I would hope my eyes weren't failing me but

 **Tol Punk-** Did I just read that Violet slit somebody's throat??

 **DWH** \- Oh yeah we were talking about that

 **Tol Punk-** Did it kill the person you're referring to?

 **Anxiety-** What do you mean by "did it kill the person you're referring to"

 **Anxiety-** I would assume slitting somebody's throat would kill them

 **Tol Punk-** YOU DONT EVEN KNOW IF YOU KILLED THEM???

 **Anxiety-** No

 **Anxiety-** Why would I wanna know that anyways it sounds boring and it won't even affect reality so

 **Author Boi-** Who did you slit the throat of

 **Anxiety** \- Uh

 **Anxiety** \- It was Ashley she was being fucking rude

 **Anxiety** \- She yelled at me. I started crying, stabbed her like fifty times, and slit her throat for good measure

 **Tol Punk** \- What was she even yelling at you about

 **Anxiety** \- Oh she said that because I was labelled as a lesbian by my peers that I couldn't be attracted to guys

 **Anxiety-** Key words: labelled... by my peers

 **Tol Punk** \- I should beat her dead ass just for that

 **Author Boi** \- I'm calling Mitch and Louis we're going to kill Ashley again

 **Anxiety-** W h a t

 **Music Gorl-** I cannot tell you how entertained I am at this tea

 **Music Gorl** \- It's just so delicious and scalding

 **Anxiety-** Y'all can't kill her again she's already dead

 **Tol Punk-** And that's why we have Louis

 **Author Boi** \- He's gonna resurrect her and then we'll kill her again

_**Music Boi is now online** _

**Music Boi** \- Violet what's your favorite animal

 **Anxiety-** Uh I guess I like crows cats and chinchillas they're all really cute

 **Anxiety-** Wait why are you asking me

_**Music Boi is now offline** _

**Tol Punk** \- Oh ok

 **Anxiety-** Concern.JPG

 **Music Gorl-** Do I l o o k like I know what a JPG is

 **DWH-** Violet has her resting bitch face on

 **DWH-** Welp now's the time for me to get absolutely ripped

 **DWH-** Catch y'all on the flipside

_**DWH is now offline** _

**Tol Punk** \- I think I might need Sophie to pass whatever she's gonna be smoking because I need something to calm down

 **Anxiety-** I might need to supervise you

 **Tol Punk-** Vi you can just say you're gonna get me out of trouble :)

 **Anxiety** \- No I'm gonna be keeping other people out of your shit, rat boy

_**Music Gorl has changed Tol Punk's nickname to Rat Boi** _

**Rat Boi-** This slander is unacceptable

 **Anxiety-** That's what I said

_**Rat Boi has changed their nickname to Tol Punk** _

_**Anxiety has changed Tol Punk's nickname to Rat Boi** _

**Anxiety-** Update on the tea

 **Anxiety-** Louis just texted me that he's going to get me two cats and a chinchilla

 **Anxiety-** Sorry to sound stupid but where is he going to get a chinchilla

 **Music Gorl-** Over the weekend he introduced me to his parents

 **Music Gorl-** And I recently discovered he's rich

 **Music Gorl** \- He could get you a house if he wanted to

 **Rat Boi-** I doubt he'll actually get you pets but he's capable of getting them for you

 **Anxiety-** No wait stop don't let him get me anything

 **Rat Boi-** Whhhyyyyy not

 **Anxiety-** My name is Anxiety for a reason

 **Rat Boi-** There is nothing wrong with expressing appreciation towards Violet through extremely questionable gifts

 **Anxiety** \- If he's serious about this I'm going to fucking cry Lou don't do this

 **Author Boi-** He just said he's going to do something so questionable that even he doesn't know why he's doing it

 **Author Boi-** Sorry to burst your antisocial bubble Vi

 **Anxiety-** I STARTED CRYING IN THE LIBRARY Y'ALL ARE FUCKIN WILD

 **Anxiety-** Sophie is giving me the weirdest look and asked me if the platypus grabbed my nose again wtf

 **Anxiety-** I need to go back to my dorm this is going to make me have a breakdown

 **Rat Boi-** I'm gonna have to take your Xanax with you Vi this is also making me emotionally unstable

 **Anxiety-** Can I die now

 **Music Gorl-** No you're stuck with us dumping love and affection on you sorry

_**Anxiety is now offline** _

**Rat Boi-** Ay she's here already

_**Rat Boi is now offline** _

**Author Boi-** The tea has been poured

 **Music Gorl** \- You got visuals on them?

 **Author Boi-** Yes I wrote and drew a comic on how good of friends they are but I guess it doesn't count anymore since they're almost-dating

 **Music Gorl** \- Almost-dating?

 **Author Boi-** Yeah

 **Author Boi-** ANYWAY yes I do have actual sight on them

 **Music Gorl-** Pour me a glass of truth brother

 **Author Boi-** Violet is legit sobbing in Marlon's arms I dunno what's wrong

 **Music Gorl** \- Oh yeah that's okay don't worry about it Aasim

**Music Gorl-**

**Music Gorl-**

**Author Boi-** What

 **Music Gorl-** Or should I say

 **Author Boi-** Oh no

 **Music Gorl** \- ASSIM

 **Author Boi-** GOD D A M M I T

 **Author Boi** \- IM GOING TO KERMIT SEWERSLIDE RIGHT NOW

 **Music Gorl** \- Wait no that's not what I meant

 **Author Boi-** INITIATING SEQUENCE: DEATHPACITO

 **Music Gorl** \- I didn't know you were into memes but Aasim n o

 **Author Boi** \- WHY MUST'NT I

 **Music Gorl** \- BECAUSE THOUST MEANS MUCH TO THINE AND THINE'S PERSONS OF MEMES

 **Author Boi-** F I N E

 **Music Gorl-** T H A N K

 **Author Boi-** W E L C

_**Music Boi is now online** _

**Music Gorl** \- Oh hey boo

 **Music Boi** \- Can I trust y'all to keep a secret

 **Music Gorl-** No but spill the tea anyway please

 **Music Boi** \- <3

 **Music Gorl-** <3

 **Music Boi-** I may or may not have done something very very stupid but don't worry I can handle it

 **Music Gorl-** That's vague as fuck what does it mean

 **Music Boi** \- The readers will know

 **Author Boi-** The readers of what

 **Music Boi** \- ;)

 **Music Gorl-** ;)

 **Author Boi-** What the fuck is going on

 **Music Boi** \- Some s t u f f

 **Author Boi-** Oh yeah that's totally specific

 **Music Boi-** Anyway I need to go do some shit because the plot is moving ONWARD!

 **Music Gorl-** Sounds overzealous to me

 **Music Boi-** That's because it is

_**Music Boi is now offline** _

**Author Boi-** I'm still so confused

 **Music Gorl-** You'll understand when you're older, Aasim

**Author Boi**

**Author Boi-**

**Author Boi-** I'm older now

 **Music Gorl-** Damn right you are

 **God-** Y'all know I'm still here right

 **Music Gorl-** You didn't say anything so

 **God-** Yeah because I need to steal the tea duh

 **Music Gorl-** Just ask for it and we can pour you a cup

 **God-** T h a n k

 

_**(4 P.M.)** _

 

 **Zombie Boi-** I don't like to be gay on main or anything but

 **Zombie Boi** \- Kpop !

 **Boii-** Wha?

 **Zombie Boi-** The really cute guys that sing and dance and do all these things that I can't do !

 **Boii-** But you can do those things too?

 **Zombie Boi** \- They make me explode with gay love

 **Zombie Boi-** Help

 **Zombie Boi-** Please

 **Boii-** How?

 **Zombie Boi-** I don't know, be gayer than the Kpop idols or something !

 **Boii-** I don't know how to do that???

 **Zombie Boi** \- It's easy ! You're really pretty so-

**Boii-**

**Zombie Boi** \- I'm vibrating and crying with queer anxiety h e l p

**Boii-**

**Boii-**

**Zombie Boi-** Don't just sit there!

**Boii-**

**Boii-** Uh

 **Zombie Boi-** What???

 **Boii-** You just called me pretty?

 **Zombie Boi-** Is that bad? D:

 **Boii-** I don't know?

 **Zombie Boi-** Then why are you typing blanks???

 **Boii-** Are you just used to calling people pretty?

 **Boii-** Because I wouldn't describe myself as pretty

 **Zombie Boi-** But you are!

 **Boii-** What justifies that statement?

 **Zombie Boi-** I know so!

 **Boii-** How would you know that I'm pretty???

 **Zombie Boi-** Hush I say that you're pretty and that means you are

 **Boii-** Is this because of Charlie?

**Zombie Boi-**

**Zombie Boi** \- You knew Charlie?

 **Boii-** Of course I knew him

 **Zombie Boi-** But how do you know him?

 **Boii-** Discord, duh

**Zombie Boi-**

_**3 people are now online** _

**Anxiety-** HugginAndMunnin.JPG

 **Anxiety-** Look at them

 **Rat Boi-** Violet did you just

 **Music Gorl-** Those are crows, Violet

 **Anxiety-** Yes and I want you to look at them because they are now my birds according to them and them only

 **Rat Boi-** Are you sure about that I heard crows can be mean

 **Anxiety-** If I can take care of Rosie and Gunther while they're in the same room then I can take care of these birds that just came up to me and squawked in my face

 **Anxiety** \- And then the cats and the chinchilla are gonna be here sometime in the evening

 **Rat Boi-** Excuse me the WHATS

**Anxiety-**

**Anxiety-** The cats and the chinchilla

 **Rat Boi-** I want you to repeat that I just need to comprehend what you just said

 **Anxiety-** Molly, Dennis, and Valor, the pets that I told you Louis was gonna get for me without my permission???

 **Rat Boi-** I THOUGHT HE WAS KIDDING???

 **Anxiety-** HE WASN'T???

 **Boii-** WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON

 **Zombie Boi-** A chinchilla? Cats? Can I pet all of them?

 **Anxiety-** You totally can, and here's what happened

 **Anxiety-** As the context suggests, Louis actually went through with what he texted me

 **Anxiety-** And he told me that he also got me two Maine Coons and a chinchilla

 **Anxiety-** So I obviously named the cats Molly and Dennis, and the chinchilla is named Valor. I love them all already

 **Anxiety-** Where the fuck is Lou I need to hug him, initiate sequence Thank You Overload, slap him, and ask why he made such a stupid decision and I'm probably gonna be smiling as I scold him

 **Anxiety** \- In thIS ESSAY I WILL-

 **Zombie Boi** \- Calm down, disaster memelord !

 **Boii-** I mean you were freaking out a little while earlier

 **Zombie Boi-** !!! Hush !!!

 **Anxiety-** My name is my current and eternal mood

 **Rat Boi** \- I'm just so shocked that he even got you these pets to begin with wtf

 **Anxiety-** I mean we live in an alternate universe where zombies don't try to eat us all the time so I guess anything is possible

 **Music Gorl** \- Sh!

 **Anxiety-** Oh right

 **Anxiety** \- I don't take back anything I said though

 **Anxiety-** It's the tea and y'all deserve to drink it

 **Zombie Boi-** You mean we could've actually walked among zombies???

 **Boii** -

 **Anxiety-** Yeah but sad shit happens all the time so

 **Zombie Boi-** IM VIBRATING AGAIN AND ITS NOT FROM BEING EXHAUSTINGLY GAY

 **Anxiety-** Distinguished homosexual becomes disaster homosexual

 **Rat Boi-** Yup this is us

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyway here's some P L O T and F L U F F because I saw that Tumblr post with the Violet/chinchilla concept. Summer drew it too so like-
> 
> YUP HERE WE GO AGAIN
> 
> Anyway yeah the next chapter's gonna be soon but after that the schedule's gonna go down the drain because I suck at deadlines
> 
> oh yeah chat names:  
> Marlon- Rat Boi


	7. ANYWAY, Now It's Time For The Salt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which James binge-watched the entire The Walking Dead TV show on Netflix or some shit, he's a good boy, and we should all be loving him and supporting his choices

**Zombie Boi-** I just re-watched the entire Fear The Walking Dead series so far

 **Zombie Boi-** Why must I cry

 **Zombie Boi-** Look at how many zombies they kill in that show

 **Music Boi-** Stop making me sad

 **Music Gorl-** Stop making me sad too

 **Music Boi-** On a happier note

 **Music Boi-** Apparently my angel name is Loomwel and I'm okay with that

 **Anxiety-** Oh yeah I saw that post too I didn't bother to figure out my name but yeah

 **Anxiety** \- Oh wait I'm supposed to be banshee screeching at you Lou

 **Anxiety-** WHAT WERE YOU THINKING LOUIS

 **Music Boi-** I know you already named them! :D

 **Anxiety-** SHUSH

 **Rat Boi-** Trying to find that Tumblr post... the one that's supposed to be your angel name or something

 **Rat Boi** \- Found it!

 **Anxiety** \- What are you planning to do with it

 **Rat Boi-** Your angel name is Violet Gideon Knight, facts

 **Anxiety-** S H U S H

 **Music Boi-** Wow nice move

 **God** \- OutstandingMove.JPG

 **RBH-** ThisIsBeyondScience.JPG

 **Rat Boi-** But Tumblr says it's Viigel

 **Rat Boi** \- Also see: Vigil/Vi's an angel

 **Anxiety-** Wtf is this flirting

 **RBH-** THISISBEYONDSCIENCE.JPG

 **Anxiety-** Minerva what are you doing

 **RBH-** Honestly? I wouldn't know

 **God-** She's doing Brody, facts

 **RBH** \- !!!

 **RBH-** You don't know that, almighty Omar

 **God-** Yeah I did it's so obvious you have big lesbian energy for her

 **Anxiety** \- Anyway I'm crying again

 **Music Gorl-** Happy tears, because I can fucking see you crying with a smile on your face

 **Music Gorl-** You have a CHINCHILLA SNUGGLED RIGHT NEXT TO YOU AND A CAT ON YOUR STOMACH I DOUBT YOUR TEARS WOULD BE OF SADNESS

 **Anxiety-** Scary but true

 **Rat Boi** \- Mind if I slide into your dorm I want to pet your chinchilla

 **Anxiety-** Sure I guess

 **Rat Boi-** I'll be there in a bit hold on

 **Anxiety-** So Louis why did you get me two cats and an exotic pet btw

 **Music Boi-** Because it's possible and this isn't canon anyway so

 **Music Boi** \- You needed some pets anyway

 **Anxiety-** Yeah but now I have five and I take care of another two in my spare time

 **Music Boi** \- Yeah I know I got you the pet food and everything

 **Anxiety** \- W h e r e  d o  y o u  g e t  t h i s  s t u f f

 **Music Boi-** I have connections ;)

 **Anxiety-** ACK

 **Anxiety-** Tenn and Willy were already difficult enough animals to begin with

 **Anxiety-** Imagine how they'll react to the three fluffballs in my room

 **Music Boi-** Hey, at least the temperature rarely goes above 76 degrees so Valor can't overheat!

 **Anxiety-** Yeah but I'm always cold

 **Music Boi** \- How can I make this better

 **Anxiety-** It's already ideal. Thank you, you lovable idiot

 **Rat Boi-** I'm no longer your lovable idiot???

 **Anxiety-** You both are my lovable idiots

 **Anxiety** \- Everybody is my lovable idiot now

 **God-** Our goddess has adopted us

 **Anxiety-** But you're god how is this possible

_**God has changed their nickname to Creachure** _

_**Creachure has changed Anxiety's nickname to Goddess** _

**Creachure-** I am jsut a creachure. thaste it. i cannoot chang this

 **Goddess-** And this is the part where I die 

**Goddess** \- Where is all this affection coming from

 **Music Gorl** \- The Official Violet Appreciation Squad (TOVAS)

 **Goddess-** S T O P

 **Music Gorl** \- NO

 **Creachure** \- Nope

 **Music Boi-** Can't stop won't stop

 **Rat Boi-** Stopping is physically impossible

_**Goddess has changed their nickname to Crows** _

**Crows-** I'm about to die bye y'all

_**Crows is now offline** _

**Music Gorl-** She just

 **Rat Boi** \- She???

 **Creachure-** Do share what she's doing

 **Music Gorl-** She's now laying on her side, chinchilla is laying near her, one of the cats is on the other side of her, the second cat is jumping up on her bed to cuddle

 **Rat Boi-** I hear the crows oh no

 **Rat Boi-** I see them

 **Rat Boi-** They think my room is Vi's

 **Music Boi** \- I mean

 **Music Boi-** She DOES spend a lot of time over there

 **Rat Boi** \- Whatever I still need to visit her

 **Creachure-** Bring forth your crows to her and she might reward you

 **Rat Boi-** Nah I'm gonna keep them and piss her off

 **Creachure-** But what if she h*lds your h*nd

 **Rat Boi-** WOW THATS A LITTLE FAR DONT YOU THINK

 **Creachure-** Just a thought

 **Rat Boi** \- WHAT CONVINCED YOU THAT WE WOULD SIN IN SUCH A MANNER

 **Creachure-** I'm gonna have to hide my stories about y'all hugging then because lord knows how you'll react

 **Rat Boi-** Yes officer, this man right here

 **Creachure-** Uh oh I have to use %.0001 of my power to obliterate them from the face of the Earth

 **Creachure-** Truly is a sad time for us all

 **Rat Boi-** Must you really write about us being emotionally close

 **Music Gorl-** But aren't you d*ting Violet

 **Rat Boi-** You dare to even imply such a slutty thing???

 **Music Gorl-** Like didn't you two k*ss or something

 **Music Boi-** Yeah I heard you two k*ssed mind spilling the beans for us

 **Rat Boi-** Spilling the beans is just the straight way of spilling the tea

 **Zombie Boi-** If a straight person and a gay person gossip would that would make bean tea??

 **Creachure** \- I believe the word you're looking for is coffee

 **Rat Boi-** BRO

 **Creachure-** Yeah I know

 **Boii** \- Excuse me what thE FUCK

 **Music Boi-** Answer the question!!! Pleaseeee??!!!

 **Rat Boi-** No need to sound so horny over it damn

 **Music Boi-** NOT HORNY!

 **Music Gorl-** Semi-horny

 **Music Boi-** NO!!!! Stop!

 **Music Gorl-** Fine. Answer the question, garbage boy

 **Boii-** Garbage boy stink man

 **Zombie Boi-** Nervous little punk boi!!

 **Rat Boi** \- James is valid and the rest of you are most decidedly not

 **Creachure-** Fair

 **Music Boi** \- Off topic!!! Did you k*ss Violet yet??

 **Rat Boi-** Calm yourself k*ssing's a little strong don't you think

 **Music Gorl-** Says the guy who would kill legions of soldiers for the person he doesn't even know if he's d*ting yet

 **Rat Boi-** SHHHH

 **Zombie Boi-** Killing's bad, but declarations of love are good... What would that be???

 **Music Gorl-** That would make it Violet's way of saying that she cares about you

 **Zombie Boi-** So... good ?

 **Rat Boi-** It's okay, I guess

 **Music Boi-** It's the punk way of saying "I love you." You wouldn't understand, James. You're too young

 **Zombie Boi** \- I'm older than most of you by at least a year

 **Rat Boi-** BUT IM ALMOST THE SAME AGE WHAT DOES THAT SAY ABOUT YOU JAMES

 **Zombie Boi-** It means I'm...19??? Mitch is also around the same age???

 **Music Gorl** \- Why are we talking about age

 **Boii** \- Age is a social construct created by the government to make us do shit when we've lived long enough

 **Music Gorl-** Yeah what he said

 **Rat Boi** \- THE POINT IS, no! I haven't k*ssed Violet because that's inappropriate!!

_**Nervous Wrecc is now online** _

**Music Boi** \- But you prolly think about it, ya nasty!!!

 **Rat Boi-** NO!!!

 **Nervous Wrecc** \- Um... What are we talking about?

 **Music Gorl** \- Marlon wants to k*ss Violet and h*ld h*nds with her!!! Ew!!!

 **Nervous Wrecc-** You can just say kiss and hold hands like normal high school students?

 **Rat Boi-** I DO NOT WANT TO DO THAT BECAUSE THAT IS INAPProPRIATE!!

 **Nervous Wrecc-** Good lord

 **Nervous Wrecc-** Marlon if you just wanted to display affection for Vi you can just,,, do that? Because that's what regular people do?

 **Rat Boi-** Oh, so you've assumed that I'm normal

 **Nervous Wrecc-** Oh, so you've assumed I'm Brody

 **Rat Boi-** !!!

 **Nervous Wrecc-** Get over here, Marlon. Bring the crows. We're gonna have to have a discussion about this

 **Rat Boi-** Uh oh

_**Nervous Wrecc is now offline** _

**Music Boi-** Marlon's in trouble!!

 **Music Gorl-** Violet's a hacker!!

 **Rat Boi-** Sh! You'll get me in even deeper trouble if I'm late!

_**Rat Boi is now offline** _

**Boii-** Hm. I should be careful around Vi then -_-

 **Music Gorl** \- Who the fuck uses that face anymore

 **Boii-** Me, Clementine

 **Music Gorl-** Oh wow okay

 **Music Gorl** \- Never considered the fact that you might count like ever

 **Zombie Boi** \- Stoop! That's mean !

 **Music Gorl-** Mean is my middle name, sorry boo

 **Boii-** !!! I'm throwing hands !!!

 **Music Gorl** \- Apologies. I forgot you're overprotective about your mans

 **Boii-** Not my mans!!

 **Zombie Boi-** Wait I was his mans?

 **Boii-** No!!

 **Zombie Boi-** Am I not allowed to be your mans?

 **Boii-** This isn't about dating this is about Clementine flirting with you

 **Zombie Boi-** But she doesn't mean it!

**Boii-**

**Boii-** Well

**Zombie Boi-**

**Boii-** I didn't know that

**Zombie Boi-**

**Zombie Boi-** How did you not know that???

 **Zombie Boi-** How??

 **Boii** \- I dunno I'm stupid

 **Zombie Boi-** No, just apparently really dense

 **Boii-** STUPID

 **Zombie Boi-** NO! Self hate is not allowed in this chat!!

 **Music Boi** \- Tell that to Violet why don't you

 **Creachure-** O O F

 **Creachure-** Oh yeah I still exist

 **Creachure** \- Hi, fourth wall! Nice to break you this evening!

 **Zombie Boi-** You know what, I WILL tell Violet that she SHOULD stop hating herself!!

 **Music Gorl-** OhOk.PNG

 **Music Boi-** Oh haha good luck

 **Zombie Boi** \- Wish me luck, Mitch and Clementine!

_**Zombie Boi is now offline** _

**Music Boi** \- You know, I really do admire his enthusiasm to do the impossible

 **Music Boi-** It inspires me to also do stupid things

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omar-Creachure  
> Violet-Goddess/Crows
> 
> Somebody give Violet an award for having her nickname changed the most, because damn, it's like she's fifty people in one body  
> Somebody give Marlon a hug. He's so confused as to what relationships are


	8. We're Here, We're Queer, And Our Joint Pain Is Moderate To Severe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Violet loves Family Funtown, facts
> 
> Kinda short, we're getting back into the swing of things

**Crows-** Yo who tried to steal Mannin I'm not saying I'll beat your ass but I'll beat your ass

 **Music Gorl-** It hasn't even been a minute since I touched him calm down

 **Crows-** Mannin is female and I am now legally obliged to throw hands with you Clem

 **Music Gorl-** We already went through this shit we shouldn't be doing this again

 **Crows-** DONT CARE YOU TOUCHED MY BIRD

 **Rat Boi-** Wow this is entertaining

 **Crows-** Do I need to shove a notebook in your face again and screech about how valid you are

 **Rat Boi-** No ma'am

 **Music Boi-** You changed him

 **Crows-** I didn't change him

 **Crows-** He was just really intimidated when I shoved that notebook in his face

 **Rat Boi** \- She's scary

 **Music Gorl** \- Soooooo what happened while I was trying to figure out my existence

 **Crows-** Nothing much

 **Music Boi-** Y'all k*ssed???

 **Crows-** Stop censoring that the only reason you should ever censor that is when you're on Tumblr

 **Music Boi-** Oh yeah right

 **Music Boi-** Y'all pressed your lips together as a romantic gesture???

 **Crows-** Uh, no?

 **Rat Boi-** I am legally obliged not to unless she gives me permission

 **Music Gorl** \- Oh well can't rush the punk children

_**Author Boi is now online** _

_**Author Boi has changed their nickname to Fanfic H0** _

**Fanfic H0-** Guess who's gonna do something that's socially questionable within this friend group

 **Music Boi-** You're gonna start going outside and talk to people?

 **Fanfic H0-** Why the fuck would I do that

 **Music Boi** \- I knew I was asking too much of you

 **Fanfic H0-** I'm planning to ask Ruby on a date to Family Funtown wish me luck

 **Crows-** TAKE ME WITH YOU PLEASE

**Rat Boi-**

**Rat Boi-** Noted

 **Crows-** Uh I mean

 **Crows-** Well you see

 **Crows-** Fuck

_**Crows is now offline** _

**Music Gorl-** My constant mood? Yeah

 **Music Boi-** My new high school quote? Definitely

 **Fanfic H0-** My feelings towards this date I plan to ask Ruby on? Non't

 **Rat Boi-** And now my brain is melted thanks

 **Music Gorl-** Anyway now for the current news

 **Music Gorl-** I had an existential crisis and legitimately said, "Oh shit I exist" out loud in class and Stephanie HEARD ME

 **Fanfic H0-** That Stephanie girl that babysits Willy?

 **Music Gorl-** Y E S

 **Music Gorl-** AND NOW IM DYING so yeah I need help thanks for coming to my TED talk

 **Music Boi-** What do I need to do

 **Music Gorl-** I dunno like flop on me and be all mushy and romantic I guess

_**Music Boi is now offline** _

**Rat Boi-** First he gives hugs to a sleeping lion and now he's going to crush his girlfriend under his weight

 **Rat Boi-** Louis is honestly the person I aspire to be one day

 **Music Gorl-** Yeah he is

_**Fanfic H0 is now offline** _

**Music Gorl-** Well then thanks for sticking with us Aasim

 **Rat Boi-** He just texted me that he's going up to Ruby in a few minutes don't be so mean to him

 **Music Gorl** \- Thanks for the advice mullet man

 **Rat Boi-** He Y

 

**(7:13 P.M.)**

 

 **Crows-** Hey I'm back from hibernating

 **Rat Boi-** Yo what's up are we still going to Funkytown or whatever

 **Crows-** Excuse me but it's Family Funtown thank you very muCH

 **Rat Boi-** Interesting argument but have you ever considered: I forget the names of places very easily so you have to help me please

 **Crows** \- To which I reply with: I can never get mad at you for forgetting stuff because I do it all the time, you're literally valid in every way shape or form

 **Rat Boi** \- Exquisite statement, however I have to raise a response that consists of the following: No u

 **Crows-** NO U

 **Rat Boi** \- N O U

 **Music Gorl-** Guys stop you're blowing up my phone

 **Crows-** How about turning off the notifications Clem

 **Music Gorl-** How dare you come up with such a simple solution to my problem

 **Crows-** Whoops sorry

 **Music Gorl-** Anyway what are you guys doing

 **Rat Boi-** Arguing over who's more valid

 **Rat Boi-** (That's Violet btw)

 **Music Gorl-** I see

 **Crows-** How dare you imply that I'm not a gremlin

 **Rat Boi-** I didn't say you weren't a gremlin I said you're valid

 **Crows** \- No u

 **Rat Boi-** No u

 **Crows-** See? He refuses to accept the truth

 **Rat Boi-** That's because the truth is that you're valid and you're trying to deny it

 **Crows-** Don't make me come over there

 **Rat Boi-** Bet

_**Crows is now offline** _

**Rat Boi-**

**Rat Boi-** I have to say this is quite terrifying

 **Music Gorl** \- So... what made you call her ma'am back there?

 **Rat Boi-** Excuse me am I not allowed to be intimidated by Violet

 **Music Gorl-** I mean she is intimidating but calling her ma'am means you're W H I P P E D brother

 **Rat Boi-** Bet

 **Music Gorl-** Bet

 **Rat Boi** \- Oh fuck she just knocked on my door

 **Music Gorl-** Then go get her, tiger!

 **Rat Boi-** No thanks I'll just curl up in here and never come out

 **Rat Boi-** I HEAR MEOWING SHE BROUGHT THE CATS

 **Music Gorl-** Then go get her, you stinky rat man

 **Music Gorl** \- Never keep a lady waiting

 **Rat Boi** \- Yeah, as if she's a lady

 **Music Gorl** \- :(

_**Rat Boi is now offline** _

**Music Gorl-** And now I'm alone again

_**3 people are now online** _

**Boii-** I heard the word alone

 **Zombie Boi-** We don't want you to be alone, Clem!

 **Boii-** You better get over here so you can pet Gunther with us

 **Music Gorl** \- So who's the third person

 **Nervous Wrecc-** Mm e

 **Music Gorl-** Wow okay

 **Nervous Wrecc-** Hold oon I ne eed to takke myy ,edication

 **Music Gorl** \- Alright we gotchu we gotchu

 **Nervous Wrecc-** :) Thannk you

_**Nervous Wrecc is now offline** _

_**Zombie Boi has changed their name to Chaotic Gay** _

**Chaotic Gay-** It's about time I had a name change

_**Music Gorl has changed Chaotic Gay's nickname to Lawful Gay** _

_**Music Gorl has changed Boii's nickname to Chaotic Gay** _

**Music Gorl-** These DnD alignments are more fitting for you

 **Lawful Gay-** DnD?

 **Chaotic Gay-** I'm,,,, bisexual???

_**Lawful Gay has changed Chaotic Gay's nickname to Chaotic Bi** _

**Lawful Gay-** ^ ^

 **Chaotic Bi-** I dunno what that face means but it's cute

**_Nervous Wrecc is now online_ **

**Nervous Wrecc-** Hi guys! I'm back

 **Chaotic Bi-** Yo

 **Nervous Wrecc** \- I don't even have to look at the new names to know who is who

 **Lawful Gay-** We're that predictable?

 **Chaotic Bi** \- No, we're fabulous

 **Nervous Wrecc-** Nice

 **Music Gorl-** Nice

 **Lawful Gay** \- Nice

 **Chaotic Bi-** James you're part of my team

 **Lawful Gay-** Oh I thought we were just complimenting you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aasim is a fanfiction hoe change my mind  
> Oh wait  
> That's impossible to do
> 
> Aasim- Fanfic H0  
> James- Lawful Gay  
> Mitch- Chaotic Gay/Chaotic Bi


	9. Honestly If Depression Wants Us Dead That Badly It Should Just Shut Off Our Organs Instead Of Hiding In Our Brains Like A Coward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Violet is officially diagnosed with sleepy bitch disease, my idea that was stuck in my head for a week is finally released, and James uses the weirdest emoticon ever known to my keyboard

**Nervous Wrecc-** I am exploding

**Crows-** Brody

**Crows** \- It's 4 A.M.

**Nervous Wrecc-** It says a lot about you when you're the first to reply at 4 in the morning

**Crows-** Shsuh

**Nervous Wrecc** \- Shsuh

**Crows-** You should stop right now before I end your career

**Nervous Wrecc-** And how do you plan to do that

**Crows-** I plan to bust your kneecaps

**Nervous Wrecc-** Oh, woooow, I'm so scared of somebody who's 5'2"

**Nervous Wrecc-** Heck you

**Crows-** If god wanted you to live he wouldn't have created me. Prepare for your demise

**Nervous Wrecc-** Was that a Team Fortress 2 reference

_**Crows is now offline** _

**Nervous Wrecc-** Shit wait nO VIOLET STOP

 

**(8 A.M.)**

 

**Music Boi-** _@Crows_ IT'S TIME TO WAKE UP

**Music Gorl-** _@Crows_ get up sleepyhead

**Chaotic Bi-** Vi I will send Gunther into your room to sit on you if you don't get up in the next minute

**Rat Boi** \- No guys that's not how you do it

**Rat Boi-** Watch and learn

**Music Boi-** Teach Us

**Music Gorl** \- Teach us

**Chaotic Bi** \- T e a c h u s

**Rat Boi-** _@Crows_ Violet I forgot what 2 x 2 is

_**Crows is now online** _

**Crows-** I AM GOING TO TEACH YOU YOUR MULTIPLICATION TABLES AND YOU WILL LIKE IT

**Rat Boi-** I just wanted you to get up I know the answer's 5

**Crows-**

**Crows-**

**Crows-**

**Crows-** I feel like you're trying to fuck with me right now, and honestly it's working too well

**Rat Boi-** Smart overgrown toddler

**Crows-** >:0

**Crows-** How dare you speak the truth

**Rat Boi-** Whoops

**Music Gorl-** This is cute

_**Music Boi has changed their nickname to Baritoned muscles** _

**Baritoned muscles-** Hello yes I am stronk mans

_**Crows has changed Baritoned muscles's nickname to BariTwink** _

**Crows-** I fixed it

**BariTwink** \- My career has just ended and my life is flashing before my eyes

**Music Gorl-** This is also kinda cute and I like the Brotp

**Rat Boi-** Can we all have a new nickname I hate being Rat Boi

_**Crows has changed Rat Boi's nickname to Mullet Man** _

**Crows-** Is that better

**Mullet Man-** This just hurts even more ;^;

_**Crows has changed Mullet Man's nickname to Teddy Bear** _

**Teddy Bear-** Hi yes what the FUCK DOES THIS MEAN

**Crows-**

**Crows-** But it is better?

**Teddy Bear-** It doesn't shatter my happiness as much but now I'm confused as to why this is even my nickname

**Crows-** All that matters is that it's better

**Teddy Bear** \- Ok I guess

**Crows-** K thanks

_**Crows has changed Music Gorl's nickname to What** _

**What-** What

**What-** The Fuck

**Crows-** :)

**Teddy Bear-** Brody just texted me after I spammed her

**Teddy Bear-** She says that Violet bound her to the ceiling

**Crows-** It's not like she'll die from it... unless you leave her there for a few days

**Teddy Bear-** VIOLET

**Crows-** Yeah

**Teddy Bear** \- WHY MUST YOU

**Crows** \- It's necessary, Marlon. Don't worry

**What** \- I am trying to listen to horror game music in peace

**BariTwink** \- And I am trying to find where you put Brody

**Crows** \- She's still in her room

**Crows** \- Now if you'll excuse me I have to eat my chicken nuggets

_**Crows is now offline** _

 

_**Violet Knight has created a group chat** _

_**Violet Knight has added 6 other people to the group chat** _

_**Violet Knight has changed 7 nicknames** _

_**Mercy Main has changed the group chat's name to Good Minecraft Christian Server** _

_**Mercy Main has removed admin rights from 6 other people** _

**Mercy Main-** Welcome to the wholesome good Minecraft Christian server. No hecks, no fricks, no double-decker dicks, and you'll be fine

**Filthy** \- I thought you were gonna eat your chicken nuggets?

**Mercy Main-** I am, but I decided to do this as well

**Filthy** \- Why are you so mean to me

**Mercy Main** \- Because I love you

**Filthy** \- Wow reading that felt super surreal

**Mercy Main** \- Typing it felt super surreal

**Filthy** \- Is anybody online or are they sleeping in

**Mercy Main** \- Unfortunately they're all asleep. I'm jealous

**Filthy** \- I'm sorry they weren't gonna stop until I woke you up

**Mercy Main** \- I will stab all three of them

**Filthy** \- Don't do that, please and thank you

**Mercy Main-** Fine 

**Filthy** \- An extra thank you to you

**Mercy Main-** I'm gonna eat and go back to sleep, any objections?

**Filthy-** I mainly just wanna join you

**Mercy Main-** Alright you have permission you filthy rat man

**Filthy** \- >:0

**Mercy Main** \- >:D

**Filthy** \- Jk I'm not mad

**Mercy Main-** That's the first time you've ever said Jk are you good over there

**Filthy-** Not to be mushy on main, but I'm great now that I get to spend time with you

**Mercy Main-** Oh my god that's more than just being mushy that's a full on declaration of love in front of the entire world right there

**Filthy-** :D

**Mercy Main-** But I still love you

**Mercy Main** \- Take a shower so you don't stink and then we can cuddle

**Filthy-** Fair enough

_**Mercy Main is now offline** _

_**Filthy is now offline** _

 

**"Meme Sluts Chatroom"**

 

**What-** I've had a little bit too much~

_**Lawful Gay is now online** _

**Lawful Gay-** All of the people start to rush!

**What-** I forgot the rest of the words

**Lawful Gay-** Where are my keys? I left my phone

**Lawful Gay-** What's going on on the floor?

**Lawful Gay-** (I love this record baby but I can't see straight anymore)

**What-** Since when have you ever seen straight

**Lawful Gay-**

**Lawful Gay-** Good point

**What** \- And how can you listen to so much Lady Gaga

**Lawful Gay-** I manage it in between being gay and making cute little sweaters for Gunther

**What-** Wow a few days ago you were calling him Buddy

**What-** Mitch has more of an influence on you than I realized

**Lawful Gay-** Hush my bisexual adopted child

**What** \- Why should I

**Lawful Gay-** Because I'll set Violet on you if you don't

**What-** Ugh fine I don't like it when I have to fend off Violet

**Lawful Gay** \- Ok thanks but I still need to find her

**What-** She's probably being diagnosed with sleepy bitch disease

**Lawful Gay-** That's a thing...? I didn't know that

**Lawful Gay-** Is she hurt? Do I need to bake her something sweet?

**What-** No it's a joke

**Lawful Gay-** I'll make her some cupcakes just in case

**What-** Oh my god James don't give her sweet stuff

**Lawful Gay-** Too late where did all this batter come from

**What-** She's going to explode from either gratitude or glucose and I don't know which one it'll be

**Lawful Gay-** I just harnessed the power of the sun to make cupcakes forgive my sins Clementine

**What-** James yoU SWEET MONSTER FUCKER DONT YOU DARE

**Lawful Gay-** I'm at her door it's too late

**What-** HOW DID YOU GET THERE THAT FAST

**Lawful Gay-** Plot convenience

**What-** WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON AROUND HERE

**Lawful Gay-** I gave her the tray of cupcakes and she's crying what did I do wrong

**What-** You broke her

**Lawful Gay** \- How do I break a person

**What-** Now that I recall she only ever got sweets from her grandmother???

**Lawful Gay-** Do I like hug her or something

**What** \- Sure I dunno how to handle Violet

**What-** I also don't know how this spiraled from the sleepy bitch disease joke

**Lawful Gay-** Just go with the flow ~0 ^ 0~

**What-** What the fuck is that emoticon

**Lawful Gay-** ~~~~~0 ^ 0~~~~~

**What-** James stop that's gay

**Lawful Gay-** I am gay

**What** \- Good point but JAMES STOP

**Lawful Gay-** ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~0 ^ 0~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**What-**

**What-** I'm going to die from how gay you are

**Lawful Gay-** Then I have to thank you for coming to my TED talk

**What-** Too late I'm dead

**Lawful Gay-** D:

**What-** Nevermind being dead is cancelled

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New Meme Sluts Chatroom names:
> 
> Mullet Man/Teddy Bear- Marlon  
> Baritoned muscles/ BariTwink- Louis  
> What- Clementine
> 
> Good Minecraft Christian Server chat names:
> 
> Mercy Main- Violet  
> Filthy- Marlon  
> Yeehaw- Ruby  
> God- Omar  
> Killed on sight- Brody  
> Thriller Night- James  
> Tsundere- Aasim
> 
> I like to imagine that Violet shared the cupcakes with Marlon when he came over
> 
> But that's just me thinking that crackships are cool


	10. I'm Not Dead, That's (Kinda) Good

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which everyone realizes the author isn't dead, and it's kinda nice but also disappointing to everyone who doesn't like them
> 
> Also in which Aasim gains self-awareness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 404 got me shook and sad so here you go
> 
> Also, ten chapters. Wow. That's a lot of time in meme hell

**Teddy Bear-** Hell yeah brother

 **Fanfic H0-** What are you even talking about

 **Teddy Bear-** It hasn't even been five lines into the chapter and you're already being judgmental wow I see how it is

 **Fanfic H0-** Five lines into what chapter

 **Teddy Bear-** ;)

 **Fanfic H0-** What the fuck is going on

 **What-** Do you want the long list or the short list

 **Fanfic H0-** Lists are weird to read I prefer actual fanfiction

 **Teddy Bear-** Whatever you say nerd

 **Fanfic H0-** >:0

 **What-** I guess Aasim could say What The Fanfuck

 **Fanfic H0-** If not for the laws of this land I would've slaughtered you

 **What-** I'd love to see you try

_**Chaotic Bi is now online** _

**Chaotic Bi-** Bold of you to assume Clementine can die, Aasim

 **What-** Yeah what he said

 **What-** Oh wait this is about me

 **Chaotic Bi-** Local badass can't understand why she's immortal

 **What-** Oof

_**RBH is now online** _

**RBH-** Pissed.JPEG

 **RBH-** I just figured out that Violet and Marlon had a thing for each other how could this have happened I thought Violet was a lesbian I-

 **Chaotic Bi-** Calm down and like, look at what's happening

 **RBH-** >>>>>>::::::::::(((((((((((((

 **Chaotic Bi-** Her sexual orientation does not dictate her romantic orientation

 **RBH-** What the FUCK is a romantic orientation

 **Teddy Bear-** Wow even I understand what that is

 **RBH-** Shut the fuck up rat man or I'll put a bullet in your mullet

 **Teddy Bear-** :(

 **What-** A romantic orientation is kinda like a sexual orientation but it defines who you experience romantic attraction to. For example, my romantic orientation is panromantic, but my sexuality is bisexual

 **Fanfic H0-** And that's the tea sis

**RBH-**

**RBH-** I still don't understand

 **What** \- I'm pretty sure it requires basic reading comprehension skills to understand that Violet is- at the very least- biromantic, but I doubt you possess such skills

 **Teddy Bear-** O O F

 **RBH** \- >:0

 **What-** Sorry, just laying down some facts

 **Teddy Bear-** This is so sad Alexa play Don't Be Afraid

_**RBH is now offline** _

**Teddy Bear-** She's either gonna try to kill me or Clementine and I can't figure out which

 **What-** I'm thinking you

 **Teddy Bear-** Clem no stop that's mean

 **Fanfic H0-** SlightParanoia.JPEG

 **Teddy Bear-** I can guarantee it won't be you

 **Fanfic H0-** Relief.JPEG

 **What-** So Mitch

 **Chaotic Bi-** Ye

 **What-** Are you gay for James

**Chaotic Bi-**

**Chaotic Bi-**

**Chaotic Bi-**

**Chaotic Bi-** Ye

 **What-** Okay

 **Teddy Bear** \- The calmest convo in this group chat to date

 **Fanfic H0-** I now have blackmail

 **What-** Why would you ever blackmail Mitch

 **Chaotic Bi-** I now have counter-blackmail

 **Fanfic H0-** Fuck he's learning

 **Chaotic Bi-** Y'all hear that? I'm learning

 **Teddy Bear-** We all heard that, Mitch. Because we read it

 **Chaotic Bi-** I'm proud of myself

 **What-** Honestly that's valid

_**Crows is now online** _

**Crows-** I am

 **Crows-** S o b b i n g

 **Teddy Bear-** :0 What's wrong?

 **Crows-** I don't know what's wrong I woke up and started crying so

 **What-** Violet it's literally 3 in the afternoon why were you still sleeping

 **Crows-** I don't know the answer to that either

 **What-** Did you stay up late last night or

 **Crows-** No

 **What-** When did you go to sleep

 **Crows-** I think it was 7 P.M.

**What-**

**What-** Violet

 **Teddy Bear-** That's incredible

 **What-** Marlon

 **Teddy Bear-** Yeah???

 **What-** Did y'all, like, roughhouse for an hour or something?? Go fucking WWE style on each other??? Like what happened???

 **Teddy Bear** \- Clementine we haven't even gotten to hand-holding

_**What has changed Crows's nickname to Tired** _

**What-**  Then did y'all do crossfit or something

 **Teddy Bear-** No

 **Tired-** Nah, I did crossfit by myself

 **Chaotic Bi-** To be fair I was the one who told her to do it

 **What-** M I T C H

 **Chaotic Bi-** Ye

 **What-** S h e ' s  s m a l l e r  t h a n  a n y  o f  u s

 **Chaotic Bi-** Ye

 **What-** I did the math and the sum of both her height and weight is the smallest of all of us

 **What-** Even Ruby

 **What** \- M I T C H

 **Chaotic Bi-** Well I didn't know she was a gremlin

 **Tired-** To also be fair I agreed to do it

 **Chaotic Bi-** Yeah!!! Don't put the blame on me, Clem!!!

 **What-** Violet this is an argument between the adults leave this to us

 **Chaotic Bi-** O O F

**Tired-**

**Tired-** :(

_**Tired is now offline** _

**Teddy Bear-** That was really mean Clem

 **What-** Shush

 **What-** I have no way to justify why I did that

 **Teddy Bear-** You're gonna apologize. Now.

 **What-** Oh shit

 **Chaotic Bi-** Oh shit

 **Fanfic H0-** Oh shit he used a period at the end of his sentence

 **Chaotic Bi-** Of course you're the one to notice

 **What-** I'm sorry

 **Teddy Bear-** Then apologize to her or I swear to god I'll make you

 **What-** Okay I'm sorry ;0;

 

_**A group chat has been created between Clementine Everett and Violet Knight** _

**Clementine Everett-** Violet

 **Clementine Everett-** I didn't mean it when I implied you were still a kid

 **Clementine Everett-** Look, I can make it up to you

**Clementine Everett-**

**Clementine Everett-** Violet?

 

**"Meme Sluts Chatroom"**

 

 **What-** She's not answering

 **Teddy Bear** \- I'll go to her room

_**Teddy Bear is now offline** _

**What-** Shit

 **What-** I'm gonna go with him

_**What is now offline** _

_**Crows is now online** _

**Crows-** I was taking a sadness break, is anyone still here?

 **Fanfic H0-** Me

 **Chaotic Bi-** Me

 **Crows-** I apologize for going offline, I'm not very good at this whole dealing with Clementine thing

 **Fanfic H0-** She's going over to apologize to you right now

 **Chaotic Bi-** And Marlon got worried and surprisingly stern

 **Fanfic H0** \- So now we're in bisexual panic mode, not fun

 **Crows-** I'm sorry for causing this much drama

 **Crows-** I'll explain the situation to them

_**Crows is now offline** _

_**What is now online** _

**What-** Any updates? Has Violet appeared yet?

 **Fanfic H0-** She was just here

 **Chaotic Bi-** Your timing was so good that you missed Vi the split second she got offline to apologize to you for having to apologize

 **What-** That's a lot to take in

 **What-** I'll tell Marlon

_**What is now offline** _

**Fanfic H0-** This is messy

 **Chaotic Bi-** Yeah

 **Chaotic Bi-** And I don't have enough brainpower for a quirky ending to this chapter, so go off I guess

 **Fanfic H0-** WAIT

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New Meme Sluts Chatroom name(s)
> 
> Tired- Violet
> 
> April Fools, I lived


	11. This One Is Shorter Than Ruby, Which Is SAYING SOMETHING

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Marlon listens to Thank U Next and Violet listens to My Heart Will Go On  
> And Violet is figuring out her romantic orientation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is kinda eh
> 
> We tried to make it funny but it just a bunch of tall babies screaming about random stuff

**Chaotic Bi-** NeVeRMiNd thE dArKNeSs

 **Lawful Gay** \- \\\N e v e r m i n d t h e s t o r m\\\

 **DWH-** [Nevermind The Blood Red Moon]

 **Teddy Bear** \- Th3 n1ght w1ll b3 0v3r s00n

**What-**

**What-** Was this planned

 **Chaotic Bi-** Yeah

 **Lawful Gay-** Indeed!

 **DWH-** YuP

 **Teddy Bear** \- Unfortunately

 **Lawful Gay-** Also!!! Minerva had a talk with Violet about sexual and romantic orientations! And like, Violet recently figured out she's panromantic! I am vibrating and it's not from being exhaustingly gay!

 **What-** That's relatable

 **DWH-** Finna congratulate her after classes

 **Teddy Bear-** Then go to fucking class you walnut of a human being

 **DWH-** Says the rat

_**DWH is now offline** _

**What-** Hello yes police I'd like to report a murder

 **Chaotic Bi-** You might need some ice for that burn, Marlon

 **Lawful Gay-** I can help !!!

 **Teddy Bear-** Iced coffee would be so much better than a murder right now

_**Lawful Gay is now offline** _

**Teddy Bear-** If he's actually getting me iced coffee I'm gonna enter Violet Panic Mode

 **Chaotic Bi-** How much sugar and cream do you want

 **Teddy Bear-** Black coffee's fine

_**Chaotic Bi is now offline** _

**What-** Okay then

 **What** \- I'll just get myself some of the gods' drink as well

_**What is now offline** _

**Teddy Bear-**

**Teddy Bear-**

**Teddy Bear-** So...

 **Teddy Bear-** Whoever finds this message on the groupchat first, just know that my hairstyle is cool and I accept what you call a rat's nest with appreciation for it

_**Teddy Bear is now offline** _

 

**(4 P.M.)**

 

 **Tired-** Read my name and figure out how I'm feeling

 **Tired-** If you guess right you get a chicken nugget

_**Teddy Bear is now online** _

**Teddy Bear-** I am here

 **Tired-** Great now play my game Detective Tapp

**God-**

**God-** Detective Tapp Dat Ass

 **Tired-** Omar, look at the destruction you've caused

 **Tired-** You're now cancelled for safety purposes

 **Teddy Bear** \- Let me guess, you're exhausted

 **Tired** \- Yeah that's the word I was looking for

 **God** \- Huh

 **God** \- I am cancelled, goodbye

_**God is now offline** _

**Tired** \- Why is the Titanic theme playing

 **Teddy Bear-** Ariana Grande is playing???

 **Tired** \- That's the new Titanic theme apparently

 **Teddy Bear-** T H AN K U, N E C TS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HA H
> 
> (I need coffee)


End file.
